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Parents nor the children know how to cope with such changes

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It is common to find that the nuclear family has evolved into an extended or complex family unit, with one or both parents remarrying after a divorce. Often times neither the parents nor the children know how to cope with such changes. We continue with our daily lives, hoping that it will sort itself out without there being any confrontations. That kind of mindset is just asking for trouble. Nothing really goes away, depending on the type of kids you have, they will either become very vocal about things or they will suppress their feelings causing distance and a strain on all relationships.

Human beings are creatures of habit and we are most comfortable when things stay the same. Any change in our environment can therefore cause us to behave unreasonably and to even think irrationally. As adults we prefer to find things where we left them, and why shouldn’t we expect our children to feel the same way, after all, kids mirror their parent’s behavior. If things are not the way we left them, we sometimes ‘fly off the handle’, shouting and screaming at anyone who can hear us. This is exactly the way some children react to mummy’s new boyfriend or daddy’s new wife. Not only do things not stay the same, another human being who will take away mummy’s attention and rob them of time with daddy has been added to the mix, obviously they are going to throw their toys out of the cot.

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What then can be done to contain the situation?

  • Include everyone in family chores and activities, your new partner and children need to learn to get along, meal times and picnics could be great for forging relationships.
  • Communication is important, let your kids know that you still love them.
  • Don’t assume anything, children require clear and simple explanations about what is happening, what is expected and what is to follow. They will be more understanding and accepting of the change.

Still having problems managing change at home? Don’t stress, with the help of a relationship coach, together we can easily restore the peace in your home.

Author : Suyan BudhooLife Coach Pretoria South Africa

For detail Information and further guidance

Please Call us at 082 339 8393  or Contact Relationship Coaching Pretoria 

You can choose words like I am strong, happy, wealthy, healthy

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Relationship Coach Pretoria

During the month of love, we at Success Focus are focusing on relationships, the relationship with yourself, your loved one’s, colleagues and the rest of the world. Be sure to catch all the articles in this series.

My Relationship with Myself

Whatever comes after the words I am is entirely up to you. You can choose words like I am weak, worthless, depressed, sad and have results such as sickness, depression and even death show up in your life or you can choose words like I am strong, happy, wealthy, healthy and prosperous. As soon as you said those positive words, didn’t you sit up and feel confident, like a waterfall washing over you, leaving you refreshed. I Am, affirmations create a sense that “I Am” worthy and powerful. Nobody should ever forget that they matter in this world.

Nobody can make you feel the way do, except you. So why not choose to live in harmony with the world rather than in resistance. Living in harmony does not mean you have to forget about your uniqueness, it just means that no matter what challenges show up in your life, you will achieve that which is important to you. Use the challenges as opportunities, opportunities to overcome your fears and develop your strength.

As parents we sometimes rob ourselves of loving and caring for ourselves, thinking that our children should always come first, at any cost. By doing this we are turning our children into bullies and self-centred monsters. They will start to believe that they are all important, and mums feelings are not. The world out there will teach them a very different lesson, no matter how special mum thinks they are. Mum’s need for peace and happiness is in no way less than her sons need for playing soccer.

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Life and Relationship Coach Suyan Budhoo South Africa

We are all whole and complete, the only person that can make us feel any less is the person in the mirror. To keep that person in the mirror happy you need to remind yourself daily that God moulded you in his image, shouldn’t you love yourself the way God loved you.

Author : Suyan BudhooProfessional Life Coach Johanesburg

For detail Information and further guidance

Please Call us at 082 339 8393  or Contact Relationship Coaching Pretoria 

The person that embarrasses us infront of our friends

The first relationship we have with another human being is with our mother. She loved us before we were born and apart from God, I doubt there will be anyone else who will love us more. By virtue of this I believe the person that has loved us at first sight is our mother.

During the first few years of our lives, mum’s our doctor, teacher, housekeeper, cook and so much more. Throughout the world when we hear the word MA a feeling of warmth and love envelopes us, like no other word can.

As we get older mum can symbolize, the person that embarrasses us infront of our friends, or tortures us with her unwanted kisses. Even though we may treat her like the scum below our shoes, her love for her children never falters or fades.

Then comes the phase when we believe our mothers are being overprotective or downright selfish when she doesn’t want us to go out with that tattooed guy with the motorbike, ‘just because she never had someone who loved her that way.’ Teenage years can bring with it mixed feelings between a mother and her child, if not handled properly it can destroy the relationship forever.

When we ourselves become parents that’s when we realize how cruel we had been to our mothers, or do we?

Sometimes the rift between mothers and daughters can lead to lifelong separation and hurt. Ma, being the Universal word for love can never be reduced   nor can it be destroyed. A mother’s heart is the pulse of energy of compassion and protection.

At no time should we allow ourselves to be sucked into a vacuum, empty and void of our mothers love. Oftentimes the only thing destroying relationships are our egos. When we move past our egos and are able to apologise and forgive freely, then only can we love like only a mother can.

Author : Suyan BudhooLife Coach Johannesburg

For detail Information and further guidance

Please Call us at 082 339 8393  or Contact Relationship Coaching Pretoria 

Despite doing your daily affirmations, positive self-talk and mind power exercises

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Mind Power Exercise

I don’t know about you but I feel like I’m being bombarded with self-development and wealth building information from every direction. But what do you when, despite doing your daily affirmations, positive self-talk and mind power exercises, nothing seems to be taking you closer to the life of your dreams, as they promised in the dvd’s.

Do you just give up, or do you persist? Could you have been wrong for buying into all the hype? I have visited this question many times during my lifetime and this is what I came up with. Nothing stays the same. A simple example, we may travel the same route daily, but we never see the same cars as we saw the previous day. We need to accept that change is the only constant. As we adapt our driving to different conditions so too must we adapt our lives to different circumstances that we are faced with.

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In order to face all the spin balls and googlies on a daily basis, there are a few things that can help us stay in the game.

Always expect better days, as I’ve said before nothing stays the same, so if you are having a bad day, chin up, tomorrow can only get better.

A smile can brighten up not only your day, but the other persons day as well, it costs you nothing and yet you are wealthier for sharing it.

Stay positive, if you are going to think, why not think good thoughts. Stress has never solved anything, infact it robs you of your ability to think clearly when there maybe a solution closer than you think.

I am sure you have heard that what you focus on, is what you receive. Instead of focusing on having a successful business or finding a perfect job, you worry about whether you will make it in business or if you will ever find that perfect job. That is why despite, doing all your affirmations and mind-power exercises you are not manifesting the expected results.

In all the self–development courses that I have attended, very few actually speak about relaxing and staying calm whilst you are trying to attract that which you want.

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Unless you can remain calm, you are not going to be able to manifest the results that you want. Our minds can be restless and can rob us of the peace that we deserve. It can make us feel insecure and incapable, if we let it, however once you learn to control that negative chatter that creeps in now and again, you will achieve all that you deserve.

My advice to you, when nothing seems to be going your way, persist… http://www.successfocus.co.za